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How to FIX a Girl...'s Problems

4y ago


After this video is uploaded, I will be going to Dennys. Sometimes it makes me wonder, going to Dennys at such a late hour is probably not good for my health. And I'm not talking about the calorie heavy, sodium laden meals they offer. What I'm actually referring to are the very interesting characters there, the ones that seem to flock as moths to a lamp in the darkness. For example, the last time I was there, amongst the three or four groups of partygoers looking like they had just finished downing one too many shots at the club, there was a man wearing, and I kid you not, a pink tutu with yellow spandex leggings and a denim jacket that looked like it belonged to Bane. He had a beard like Santa and held a pair of Minnie Mouse ears-on-a-headband straight from Disneyland. And, I swear I'm not making this up, he had some of the nicest most impeccably manicured feet and toenails I've ever seen, man or woman. He sat there sipping on a decaf coffee and every three or four minutes he would cough or grunt or grunt-cough and mutter what sounded like 'Pinocchio, don't smoke that cigarette'. I sure hope he's there when I go back there tonight because if he is, I will take a picture and Instagram that crap immediately. And if he's not there, I'll probably just Instagram my pancakes cause who doesn't love pancakes? Oh right, I hate pancakes.